i got the chance to weigh in this morning for the first time all week. i was shocked.
that is way too close for comfort.
molly came over and we went to the pool. i felt so gross in my bikini. there was noticable pudge puffing out from my swimshorts. i didn't want to take my shirt off. when i went to the bathroom, i had trouble pulling my wet shorts up. still, i was expected to eat something at the pool, and when i saw the size of the funnel cakes i felt that was my safest bet. dinner was also mandatory, a veggie burger and tater tots. i'm gross.
i downloaded a bunch of music from the pretty reckless, taylor momsen's band, and it's helping me really get motivated. her music is really badass and upbeat, and listening to her voice reminds me of her body, exactly what i want to look like. tomorrow i'm hitting the treadmill with taylor blasting in my ears.
i have to start working harder. today was such a wake up call. i made a deal with my gf that she's not gonna let me eat like shit around her anymore; i always do because i just eat whatever she feels like eating. from now on, no more "breaks" from ana when i'm with her.
i wish i could fast...
stay strong, think thin, live ana